


The Dance

by Auggusst



Series: The Soldier And The Scientist [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers - Freeform, Love, M/M, Pining, Realization of Feelings, The Avengers - Freeform, break ups, development of feelings, mcu - Freeform, sort of enemies to lovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-19
Updated: 2018-01-19
Packaged: 2019-03-06 17:40:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,428
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13416285
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Auggusst/pseuds/Auggusst
Summary: Steve Rogers and Tony Stark did not get along. Not by a long shot. At least, not at first. They certainly didn't love each other. Not by a long shot. At least, not for a while. Eventually, things changed. Each were determined not to fall, sure in their thoughts that this could never end well, that they could never be together. It's safe to say that they were unprepared for what life threw at them.





	The Dance

**Author's Note:**

> In case you haven't noticed, this entire series is written out of order because I'm bad at sticking to things. But here! An official beginning to this little collection!

It wasn’t love at first sight. At least, that’s not what either party would call it. In fact, it was more like frustration at first sight, maybe even disdain or hatred.

Tony had always had strong feelings about Captain America. He was raised on the idea of a strong, handsome All-American hero fought and defeated Nazis, who sacrificed his life to protect his country and tragically left behind the world he knew. It was the only thing his father ever talked about, was the only connection they had. Captain America meant a lot to Tony— he daydreamed of befriending the legend, dreamt that the Captain would save him from his childhood bullies. He was a source of comfort and inspiration.

Then, Tony started to grow up. He started to hate the idea of Steve Rogers, detested him for what he had done to his father. Howard’s obsession with finding his lost friend trumped any form of attachment he had for his family. He drank. He shouted. He ignored. Sometimes, he threatened to hit. With every year, it got worse, and as time went on, Tony distanced himself from his childhood hero. The daydreams which once delighted him were merely there to mock him as an adult, sneering in triumph at the fact that they had stolen his childhood and deprived him of a father. Tony planned on harboring this hatred probably until the end of his days. It was safe to say he never expected to meet Steve Rogers in person.

It was bizarre, really. When Tony heard that Cap had been found, he wasn’t sure what he felt. It was a conglomerate of excitement, dread, and anger. This mess of emotions only intensified the first time he laid eyes on Steve Rogers in the flesh. He was as handsome as the pictures and old films, and taller than Tony expected. There was something about him, an aura, utterly unique and hypnotizing. However, Tony wanted nothing to do with it. The entire experience reminded him of his father, and he found himself asking why he was never good enough. He was a good kid— smart, talented, behaved well enough. Why was Tony less important than someone who wasn’t even there? Why couldn’t Howard put in half the effort to spend time with Tony as he did obsessing about his work and the search for the lost hero? Tony could never understand. He wasn’t sure he wanted to understand; the answer might just make him angrier. He would be the first to admit the initial meeting and ensuing days with Steve Rogers left a bitter taste in his mouth.

It didn’t go much better for Steve. Waking up after missing seventy years wasn’t easy. The world had changed so much, and he wasn’t sure it was for the better. He searched for a sense of familiarity somewhere, anywhere. He was frustrated, lonely, and struggling to move forward. He only accepted the invitation to the Avengers because it would be a waste of his abilities if he didn’t. Steve never expected to feel comfortable and loved again, and struggled to come to terms with that reality. He had lost everyone he had known. Peggy was still alive, he found out soon enough, and was relieved to hear so, but he knew things could never be the way they were. In a rapidly changing world, the old soldier felt at a standstill. He was an anachronism, and would never be able to step in time with the world around him. He read the files of his future coworkers, and for the slightest moment thought he would at least be able to make some connection with Howard’s son, Tony.

If asked now, Steve would absolutely say he misjudged Tony. The file he was given to read was partly at fault for his initial disdain. It barely focused on the positive elements of Tony’s past, and instead emphasized his selfish behavior and numerous scandals. The various magazine clippings and articles within the file didn’t help either. It was no wonder Steve didn’t get along with him initially, especially when Tony’s first instinct when meeting someone new was to put on his public image instead of being genuine. He always wore a mask when meeting someone new, always felt the need to perform. Steve just happened to hate Tony’s mask. He hated who the world believed Tony Stark was, but didn’t know the brunet well enough to understand that the mask and the real Tony were different. It took a long time to see the truth.

He couldn’t deny the strong connection between the two. They glared at each other, heart rates elevated, scornful words and threats slipped from their mouths seemingly without prompting. Working together initially was difficult, very difficult. They couldn’t go ten minutes without arguing. The arguments were intense, and loud. The rest of the team routinely had to separate them. They could sense an argument coming like clockwork. Steve couldn’t believe someone could get him to act so irrationally. He’d never worked with someone before that he wanted to choke so much. But he couldn’t stay away. He couldn’t be the ‘bigger person,’ so to speak. Every little quip, every specific roll of Tony’s eyes drew Steve in. It was impossible to stay away, like the worst magnet in the world.

Tony couldn’t stop. He simply couldn’t stop provoking Steve. He thought about it every day. He hated him, and he loved to hate him. He never felt more alive than when the two were locked in an argument, inches from each other, ready to strike. Their altercations rarely became physical, never more than a strong arm grasp or a shoulder shove, but it was enough to invigorate him. The brunet wasn’t sure why he did it. Maybe he was bitter because of his crushed childhood dreams, the unresolved issues with his father. Maybe it was something more. He didn’t know for sure. The magnet was strong, and he was sure it would never stop pulling them towards each other, two forces to be reckoned with, ready to clash in an instant. Sometimes one wished the other would disappear. That was, until it actually happened.

There came a time when they were separated during a mission. Steve was missing for three days, and Tony couldn’t have felt more miserable. He barely slept, didn’t eat. He was snappy, defensive when anyone tried to talk to him. He dedicated all of his efforts to finding Captain America, and was relentless in his duty. He thought he might feel some relief to get some distance; after all they had seen each other almost every day and argued non-stop. Instead, he felt anxious, and lost.  He felt empty. It didn’t take much for anyone to see that he wasn’t his usual self, to see how shaken he was at the situation. No one dared mention it to his face, and if they did, he would have vehemently denied that he felt anything at all about the situation.

On the other end of the spectrum, Steve, who turned out to be stuck in the jungle were they had been separated, of course knew how to survive. He found supplies and shelter easily enough. The difficult part was finding a way home, or being able to contact the team. To his utter surprise, the person he thought most of when he was missing was Tony. How would Stark reaction when they found him? Did he even miss Steve at all? What was their relationship, truly? Could they even call each other friends, with how they acted? The more he thought, the more he realized he would be distraught if something happened to the brunet. For a moment, the possibility of never seeing Tony again paralyzed him. The absolute panic that the thought formed in his chest was something he never wanted to experience again. They were barely friends. Bickering with Tony was a prominent part of his daily life. He doubted they would ever calm down around each other. But when they didn’t bicker, they made good teammates out in the field. They could coordinate wordlessly, when the going got tough, though their ideals and plans couldn’t have been more different. There was a unique nature to their relationship. If something happened to Tony, would Steve be able to move on, or would it destroy him?

As the months went on, he realized it would destroy him. He found they argued less. Sometimes they managed to get along for a few days without any incident. The sharp glares turned into somewhat playful glances, the insults became friendly teases. They spent even more time together than before. They began to coordinate in the field. Of course, they still fought, especially over tactics, and when Steve was out for blood, his words sharp and meant to hurt, he instantly regretted them, finding something deep in Tony’s brown eyes that filled his stomach with guilt. Apologies were out of the question— both parties were far too proud to ever admit their mistakes verbally, but when things were bad, it clearly took a toll on both, and the team noticed. Insinuations were made, and consistently shot down, usually accompanied with sharp laughter or an averted gaze. Steve and Tony were blind to their own emotions, and it drove everyone else mad.

Tony couldn’t pinpoint the moment he realized he might feel something more for his teammate. No, they could be considered friends now, partners even, when it came to battle. Maybe deep down, he had always felt more, but his heart was subdued by his brain, which turned the attachment into frustration. As the days went on he didn’t get satisfaction from their arguing. In fact, it only made his heart clench, and on occasion, would bring him close to tears. He valued Steve’s opinion, craved his presence, thought about him constantly. Tony had Pepper, and he loved her dearly, but more and more he found he couldn’t get Steve out of his mind. He doubted what he felt was real, maybe it was just a passing thing that he could forget about in a few months, but he soon began to realize it wasn’t. He was distracted, maybe even a little obsessed with Captain America all over again— like when he was a child. He began to look up to his old hero once more, and he wanted the blond’s approval, and attention. Tony couldn’t stop talking about him to Pepper or Rhodey— the people closest to him. He tried to stop, but he just couldn’t. Anything noteworthy that Steve said or did, he felt compelled to retell with enthusiasm. After a few weeks of this behavior, his friends had decided it was enough. Pepper took him aside. They sat down, had a serious chat. It took Pepper confronting him about his feelings for Tony Stark to finally realize it— he was in love with Steve Rogers.

The path to realization was no easier for the blond. He found himself watching Tony from the side when they walked together; he found himself asking personal questions that the brunet would sometimes answer, despite never offering an answer before. He loved their quiet conversations, the semblance of harmony they had created. He found his heart skipping a beat at parties, when Tony was dressed his best and performing for their guests. Steve found himself jealous, when the brunet’s attention was elsewhere, especially when it was long. He thought of those gorgeous dark eyes, always full of emotion, and other small details, like the way Tony’s nose twitched when he felt distressed, or how precise the movements of his fingers were when he worked on a project. He noticed just how many times Tony sacrificed himself in a fight, how much he cared for the team and the things he did to show it. Steve was absolutely convinced the file that he read so long ago was entirely wrong. Tony had proven himself time and time again to be nothing but caring and full of love, intelligent and creative. After he found himself daydreaming about the brunet for about the millionth time, he was also convinced that he was completely and idiotically in love with Tony Stark.

They entered a dance, well timed and fluid, but cautious and filled with doubt. Tony believed Steve would never return his feelings, and Steve never considered that Tony would actually give him the time of day. Their casual contact increased, their stares grew longer, but neither made a move. Besides, Tony was still with Pepper, and he loved her. He never considered hurting her. He never purposely did anything to harm their relationship. But he found himself struggling, in more ways than one. His anxiety got the better of him, drove him to madness on occasion. He acted irrationally, he put himself in danger, he grew obsessed with his creations, and he searched for comfort where it was impossible to find.

The conflict with The Mandarin resulted in fallout that was unavoidable. Pepper had simply had enough. Tony couldn’t blame her, not really. That didn’t make the blow any easier when she broke up with him. Steve was there, as a friend, to pick up the pieces. He didn’t make a move, didn’t push for anything. He still doubted the scientist returned his feelings. Tony wasn’t sure how to proceed. He was stressed, disappointed in himself and struggling daily. A lot of his struggle came from the end of his relationship, but it was more personal than that. Tony, as he had done his entire life, struggled the most with his own identity.

And so the dance continued. Endless, it seemed. It had transformed into something slow and hesitant, filled with longing. But, it was never finished. Neither party was sure it would ever end. Steve gladly sprung into action to protect others, but he couldn’t summon the courage to admit his feelings. The possibility of rejection struck him harder than any blow by an enemy. Tony doubted anyone would enter a relationship with him again, and wasn’t sure he could take it, after all of the things that had happened with Pepper. After some time she became his friend again, but they weren’t what they were before. Steve sensed the change in Tony— everyone did. But no matter what plan he formulated, how many words he practiced in his head, he couldn’t find the right ones to end the dance.

It went on and on, until one day, late at night, it finally stopped.


End file.
